Coach’s Wife

The Coach’s Wife Fight Song

I am a coach’s wife, I wear my team colors bright
I’ll travel any distance to see my team play tonight.
No matter what the “season”, I will be a faithful fan
Because I stand beside the coach, the leader, the man.
So bring on the fun – I’ll even face the strife
‘Cause I know God will give me strength to be a coach’s wife!

I’m Coach’s Wife.

Let me be the first one to say that this role is very out of my element…just as my ministry is out of my husband’s. I never played sports, but my husband was quite the athelete. Geoff was an excellent baseball player in Highschool, so much that his skills gave him the opportunity to play for the NY Mets at 18 years old. He and his father decided it would be best for him to go to college instead, this path led him to play division 1 baseball at Kent State University. His career in baseball stopped there. He went forward with his degrees, we got married and had children. During the story of our marriage, we both became saved Christians. The insight God gave us about our life songs was incredible. The fact that Geoff did not go into the minor or major league’s was all a part of God’s plans…Geoff did not fail, he was made for something different. This was hard for him to comprehend, but there was something out there that made him feel more alive than playing competitively. This something was coaching.

Years ago, when God blessed us with a son, I just knew hidden in my husband’s heart was the desire for the day our little guy was able to pick up a ball and bat…if this wasn’t God’s will, so be it. But, that “feeling” was there that perhaps the same gift of atheletism God gave my husband, he would give our son. Boy, was that ever right. They are like two peas in a pod. Sometimes it amazes me that this woman, born with 2 left feet, could have ever given birth to a child with such giftedness.

Indeed, my husband became a coach for our son and a team of boys. But with this huge blessing, there has had to be a lot of give and take. My husband and son are typically gone 2-3 nights a week as I stay home with the girls {this means 12 hours a day of no hubby!}. During the season, our weekends are typically filled with practices, baseball games and tournaments. It’s very busy. Our girls are still young and they don’t always want to go to baseball games and once we are there, they don’t typical want to watch the baseball games {lol}. The schedules, planning, packing, laundry, snacks, and gear….oh the gear, that goes along with it all is immense. Let’s just say this Mama stays busy. There are times I am so busy looking after the girls that I only catch glimpses of the games. But, I just have to be there…there isn’t a choice for me. My husband is deep into his ministry and my son is living his glory days. This, I cannot miss. I choose to support this. I’m their biggest fan.

{Our daughter kissing Coach Daddy}

{Keeping the girls busy at the games}

Now, there is more…

As Coach’s wife I have had to learn how to have thick skin. I typically sit away from the crowd {which is hard for me- you know I love people}…but at times, sitting in the crowd would mean I’d have to hear critism. I just don’t have the strength to hear discouraging words about the way my husband coaches or the way my son plays. But alas this is the name of the game. It’s intense. This happens.

But ….as coach’s wife my heart breaks knowing how much time, love, effort, prayers and even money go out to these boys and the families in this ministry….I want to defend my husband during these times, but I sit away…knowing that God knows his heart and God will give him the energy, skills, and time he needs. It doesn’t matter what anyone thinks…it’s just him and God. I smile, I’m kind, I try to let it go… but deep down…it hurts. I’m reminded of 1 Peter 3:4~ “Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and kind spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight”.  

With any ministry there are struggles, but I have to say the blessings have outweighed them… My son gets his dad as a coachI can’t imagine how many boys would love this opportunity. Our family gets to cheer for one another. Team work is being taught, God’s gift’s are being shown, fun is happening…and I have to shout this out-boys have taken turns praying before games. It brings me to tears knowing that God is being glorified for the game He made. He made it all…so yes, God made baseball. This too was for His pleasure.

There is more…Geoff gets to be part of a group of men with similar interests and the same passion for the sport and for their sons. He loves these guys. It’s so awesome to look out and see men working together in their son’s lives like this. They are making memories that their son’s will never forget.

Encouraging words come via phone, text and e-mails throughout the days -they bring SO much joy into my husband’s world. He always tells me about these moments…it makes him feel so good. It makes me feel so good that others are supportive of him. What a blessing.

I am very proud of my husband and his dreams…there are many kinds of coaches, but what God has called him to be is a coach that guides boys with the natural gift …this is his thing, his element, his passion. He loves these boys and enjoys them so much. He wants to see them grow with this game and wants to help families get scholarships, he wants to advice them on things he didn’t know about and wish he did …but most of all he wants to be their biggest fan and a Godly influence. There are so many opportunities to fail {and I am sure he would be the first to admit when he does}, but there is so much love and passion within this ministry.

Thanking God that I’m Coach’s Wife. Go Team.

“Wives understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ”

~Eph 5:22

Are YOU a coach’s wife? What encouragement do you have? What are you struggles? Would LOVE to hear from you!

Signature

Comments

  1. I do know Gari Meachum talks a lot about being a baseball players wife–and all the struggles and challenges that have come from it and how she has grown, maybe it will encourage you <3 http://trulyfed.blogspot.com/

    Kim

  2. tracy kelley says:

    I too am a coaches wife, but I play the assistant coach. I can relate entirely to your story in most of the areas, except my son is the bat boy and our youngest daughter is the water girl! We coach my daughters softball team and have for 3 years. Our son does taekwondo and we are his biggest fans! But I have had parents complain to me about my hubbys coaching and especially when we are losing, which happens. I have always chosen to stand up for my hubby and say, we don’t look for wins on the scoreboard but individual and team victories. For example I always point out how the girls have learned new skills and tell them something their daughter is improving at and how great she is at certain things. I point out the the plays the girls did great at. Those are victories for us! They are 7 yo and we are here to train and equip them, like god we can only teach and instruct and encourgae them but what they do on the field is up to them, like our walk with god. usually I get a great response, sometimes I do not. I always let them know they have the option to put they don’t want us as coaches in the future. But so far we have only had people requesting us again and others requesting us who have played on other teams. I love being a coaches wife!

  3. This was a fabulous and timely post for me to read this morning. My husband is a youth pastor here in our area and that keeps us, as a family, plenty busy. We are 3 years in and God has been so faithful and good to us as we transitioned into “ministry life”. Recently my hubby voiced his idea of wanting to get involved at local middle school with boys basketball. This would give him more “face time” with local students and parents who don’t know the Lord, as well as some of our own flock – to encourage them! Wouldn’t you know there are coaching positions that JUST opened up 🙂 Anyway, he’s looking into it – and a huge part of my heart is excited, eager and encouraging! But there’s a teeny weeny part that almost has a panic attack as I think of MORE time away for him, MORE hours in the day, MORE ministry – full of time, and hurts and people. 🙂 So this was a great perspective for me and great encouragement! Thanks!
    I think it’s wise of you to sit aside from the crowd… no need to hear negative, the Lord knows what he’s doing and we can trust Him! As a pastors wife I have learned early on what crowds to sit away from for just this reason. Sad, but, true. The Lord heals those hurting places too, doesn’t he?! 🙂 GREAT POST!
    Something I’m hopeful to do IF he does become a coach is to be just as involved as I can… whether its sending snacks for pregame stuff, having guys over here with the hubby or something like that… Want to be involved and behind the hubs!

  4. My boys are grown but I was a coach’s wife when they were young. I understand many of your struggles especially the one about hearing negative comments. I used to pray God would shut my mouth when I’d go to a game or at least let me only say good things. Let’s just say it was only by the grace of God that I was able to do that:-) At least most of the time.

    I encourage you to encourage your husband to keep up the good work.
    My oldest son and his wife just had their first child. My first grandson:-) My son was talking to me the other day about his career choice. He is in the military and his time will be up in November and he’s trying to decide if he should reenlist. If he does reenlist he will be deployed in Feb. for a year to Afghanistan.(It would be his 3rd deployment) He told me he wants to get out of the military life because he doesn’t want to miss out on his son’s childhood. He wants to be able to coach his little boy’s baseball team like his dad coached his. That tugged at my heart. To think all the days we sat at the ballpark and my husband put himself out there to be a coach paid off.
    BTW I asked my son how he’d feel if his son didn’t want to play baseball and he said it didn’t matter. He wants to be there for him whatever he wants to do.

  5. Such a sweet post! I love the pics of the family!!! You are a GREAT example of a supportive wife! 🙂

  6. Angela Hall says:

    That is a wonderful post! I am actually the coach of our girls’ team. They both played on the same team this year and I was lucky enough to get to help out coaching (along with 2 other parents). We’re switched in our family; I was the athlete and my husband was not. But he was at most of the games keeping an eye on our little boy (who’s 2 and already has an arm on him) and helping in the dug out. It was great to see and a great experience. Our girls loved having both of us there and helping with the team.
    I’m sad that “they” have turned softball into fast pitch and made it more like baseball. In my day girls had their own sport separate from boys. So I don’t see my girls playing past 8 years of age because of this. Call me crazy, but I think “they” should have left it alone and stop making girls out to be like the boys.
    But we are enjoying our crazy summers (this was our 3rd) of t-ball and we look forward to a few more years of it. I imagine we’ll get to continue with our sons (we’re due to have another boy in August).

  7. Janelle,
    I love your sweet heart! I am surprised your not feeding everyone..LOL! If you announce your the snack mom I won’t be surprised;-)
    Blessings,
    Suzanne

  8. Melissa W. says:

    Janelle,
    Love this post! I am also a coaches wife…my husband coaches high school football where we both graduated from. It’s great and I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world but there are times when it is very hard. To a lot of the fans he is great when we win but when we lose it’s a whole different story. 🙁 It is hard as the coaches wife especially when you know your husbands heart and all the time and energy they put into coaching. This was very encouraging to me as we are 3 weeks away from the start of his football season. Thanks for sharing your heart here!
    Blessing, Melissa

  9. Kathleen says:

    My sweet hubby is the kindest and most humble man I know … except when it comes to sports …. then he is super intense and has a strong spirit of competition. When he coached our sons in baseball, I gained a new ministry … baking lots of chocolate chip cookies for the teenage umpires after my husband lost his temper a bit or disagreed with a call. 🙂 He was always quick to apologize and equally as quick to ask me to whip up a batch of cookies for someone.

  10. This post touched me in so many ways as my husband has been coaching my son for the past 8 years, and this will probably be the last year as he is entering high school this fall. We had a baseball tournament (which we won!) this past weekend where I have needed to seperate myself often from the other parents due to various comments they were making and I was wondering what God was trying to teach me in these situations–other than to keep my mouth shut–which was very difficult at times. I had to choose carefully who I watched the game with and what words I spoke.

    I also have two tag-along daughters to entertain…which is a nice distraciton at times. This is the life that they are used to–so we’ve always tried to make it fun for them too. They love to play with the other sibings!

    It was refreshing to hear that I am not alone! Feel free to do a post on how to best feed a ball team 🙂

  11. Girl you have NO idea just how close our lives are. I have lived this life for 15+ years. I have 3 boys 22. 15 & 9 they all play baseball. It wasnt until 3 years ago God worked on us to turn it into a ministry. My husband teaches them so much that point to Christ that it makes my heart sing. He prays with the kids before every game and if we happen to play on Sunday we do Sunday morning devotion before the first game. This insteals in them that God is first in everything we do. We encourage the team to go out together for dinner so they can fellowship and of course for us to be able to build a relationship with the parents. We also do once a month fellowship where we get the kids together so they can build a lasting relationship. The key to showing Jesus is building a relationship! That is the most important part of our team is building a relationship so that we can share Jesus with them through our actions! Our roles as the Coach’s wife is very important in showing other wives how God works in our marriages. Once we take this role God has placed on our husbands we get to see God work in every move!!!

  12. Hi, I am a basketball coaches girlfriend and its funny how I just realized the same time last year (basketball season) I discovered your website and ‘googling’ some kind of coaches wife support to help me better understand my man. Thank you for your story, ministry and all that you do. Seeking God first is so important and that’s what caught my eye and made yours stand out to me. I’m learning how to pray more and seeing his coaching as being called to serve others.

  13. Kristina A says:

    HI, I am a high school coaches wife and looking I am interested in finding a bible study group or even self paced that is geared towards coaches wives. Do you know of any??

Speak Your Mind

*