I have a special guest posting today! Gina and I have worked along side one another for 5 years now and we finally were able to meet in person just last weekend (picture below). Gina is so down-to-earth and has such a heart for young women. It gives me so much hope to meet someone who is willing to be transparent, share biblical and life wisdom, and pour so much of herself into others. Her writing always touches home for me personally – I was just blessed by this very post this morning.
I have many personal weaknesses, but I would say that my biggest one by far is that I don’t know when to leave people alone! If there is a conflict or misunderstanding, I can become almost obsessed with wanting to clarify and make things right. There’s something inside of me that thinks that if I just explain more clearly, am really honest with how I feel, or just explain things one more time, that the other person will understand, see my heart, and everything will be okay. Normally, that has not been the case.
When I continually try to fix things, I tend to make a pain of myself and drive people away. Then I feel foolish and sometimes I think I might even be perceived as being a crazy lady. I just want everything to be okay…
There’s something within me that just wants peace. I want to be understood. I want to take care of what I need to take care of. But I also want the other party to acknowledge their part in things. I wish it were an easy process, but unfortunately it isn’t. I’ve had it back fire on me too many times. You’d think I would have learned by now.
God has had to bring me back to the same place so many times. He has had to remind me that I am not in control, that He is the one who opens and closes the eyes of people, and that I need to let Him do His work in His time.
7 THINGS I SAY TO GOD WHEN I DON’T CHOOSE TO WAIT ON HIM:
- My glory is what is important.
- I want my name cleared.
- I want peace and for everything to be okay no matter what it takes.
- “God, you’re not working fast enough.”
- I don’t want anyone to be upset with me or think the wrong things about me.
- I am being driven by pride.
- “I can do a better job than You are doing.” (My frustration shows and I respond emotionally, and make things worse.)
8 THINGS I SAY TO GOD WHEN I CHOOSE TO WAIT ON HIM:
- “God, Your glory is what is important.”
- The good of the other person is what is important.
- “God, I trust You with my reputation.
- “Lord, I trust You and Your timing.”
- “I have faith that You know what is best God, even if I don’t see what You are doing.”
- I am being driven by humility. An ever present realization that I am utterly dependent on Him to make things right. It is completely out of my hands.
- “I am willing to die to myself for Your purposes God.”
- “I am a mess. God, You are not. I make bigger messes. You soften hearts and restore.”
The only thing harder than sitting back and waiting on God to do His work in others, is being sadly aware that I have rushed ahead of Him and made a mess, making His job of restoration harder!
But you know what else waiting on God does?
It gives time for God to show me my own heart more clearly.
When I rush ahead, I am focusing on what the other person needs to see. When I wait on God, I am praying for the person to see what they need to see, and God always reminds me to pray that for myself as well.
I am humbled at how impatient I can be, and I am praying that God would continue to do the work He has been doing all along, even though I sometimes am not able to see it.
Gina Smith is a busy mom of two adult children, and wife to Brian. She and her husband have been in ministry together for over 20 years, working with college students and young married couples. Gina has recently authored her first book, entitled: “Grace Gifts: Celebrating Your Children Every Day”.
A note about my book:
“Grace Gifts: Celebrating Your Children Every Day” is not just another book about “grace based parenting”. “Grace Gifts” is a short book, is perfect for busy moms, and is filled with ideas and practical ways in which you can show your kids and their friends love and grace, and how that can be used to point them to God.
Grace Gifts will help you learn how to offer your children the gift of grace by encouraging you to:
- Tune in
- Enter into their trials
- Respect them
- Celebrate their friends
- Bless them
As parents, we can be tempted to grasp for methods of parenting, when what we really need is principles. There are no perfect parents and no parenting style is perfect. The principles found in “Grace Gifts” can be carried out a million different ways. They can actually custom-fit your particular family. I have described the grace gifts and what they looked like in my home, and my prayer is that it will encourage you to think about how it might look in your own home. The principles covered in “Grace Gifts” apply to any age. My hope is that you will reference it over and over again.
Read more about “Grace Gifts”, and where you can purchase it by going here: